Aug. 14, 2025
Mephisto214: Gamertags Tell His Story | Reinvention Through Names, Grief, and Gaming
"All your story needs is heart." In this deeply moving episode, Mephisto214 shares a story not often told—one of survival, reinvention, and the digital identities that saved his life. From Vagabond83 to Torch512 and now Mephisto214, every gamertag marked a turning point. What began as a comic book nod evolved into a tribute to transformation—rooted in loss, depression, fatherhood, and rebirth. Through heartbreak and healing, Mephisto forged a persona that now stands as a beacon for others see...
"All your story needs is heart."
In this deeply moving episode, Mephisto214 shares a story not often told—one of survival, reinvention, and the digital identities that saved his life. From Vagabond83 to Torch512 and now Mephisto214, every gamertag marked a turning point. What began as a comic book nod evolved into a tribute to transformation—rooted in loss, depression, fatherhood, and rebirth. Through heartbreak and healing, Mephisto forged a persona that now stands as a beacon for others seeking light in dark places.
We Talk:
– The story behind the name Mephisto214
– Gaming through grief, loss, and personal evolution
– The story behind Torch512 and how gaming helped him survive a personal crisis
– Fatherhood, Minecraft, and making space for joy
– Why every gamer’s story matters—even if you're not a streamer
🃏 And in the ReRoll…
We meet Mephisto214’s final form: a spacefaring, samurai-armored vanguard charging into battle with a crimson blade and a noble heart. Part Titan, part dad—his digital avatar mirrors the quiet strength behind the mic.
Guest: Mephisto214
Hosts: Scarto46, Ryanocerus, Marthah Maple
Produced by: Gamertagged Studios
⚠️ Content Note: This episode includes a heartfelt discussion of mental health and personal crisis, including themes of suicidal ideation. We understand these topics may be difficult for some listeners. Chapters are clearly marked so you can navigate the conversation in a way that feels right for you. If you or someone you know is struggling, you are not alone. Free, confidential support is available 24/7 at 988 or 988lifeline.org.
In this episode, we’re taking a moment to spotlight Take This, a nonprofit at the intersection of mental health and gaming. From AFK Rooms at conventions to their Accelerate mentorship program, they’re building safer, more human spaces for players and creators alike. Learn more or support their work at TakeThis.org.
Gamertagged is a podcast by Gamertagged Studios
Digital identities. Real stories.
We explore the meaning behind gamertags, usernames, and online personas through interviews with gamers, creators, and the people behind the screen.
Spotlights & Partnerships
We collaborate with aligned creators and causes. From mental health to digital identity advocacy, we use our platform to lift others up.
Now spotlighting: Take This - Supporting Mental Health in Games https://www.takethis.org/
Meet the Crew
Scarto46 – Host & founder. Game dev, storyteller, identity nerd. Architect of the ReRoll.
Ryanocerus – Cohost & composer. Chaos generator with a lo-fi heart.
Portabella – Producer & editor. Emotional compass of the pod.
Sue-She – Art director. Turns identities into cards and vision.
Marthah Maple – Guest & partnerships lead. Builds the bridge between story and studio.
What is Gamertagged Studios?
A studio built by friends and family. We tell stories that matter about identity, memory, and what it means to be seen online.
Learn more: gamertaggedpodcast.com
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Everything lives here → linktr.ee/gamertagged
00:00 - Your Story Needs Heart
01:28 - Where Did Mephisto214 Come From
03:08 - First Days of Online Gaming
05:00 - Marvel, Comics & Characters That Inspire
06:25 - Reinvention Through Gamertags
11:51 - ⚠️ The Torch Era: Surviving Darkness
19:22 - Why Join Gamertagged?
25:45 - Gaming Today & Proud Dad Vibes
27:58 - Who Is Mephisto214 Today?
31:19 - Re-Roll: Introducing The Crimson Vanguard
40:18 - Final Reflections
WEBVTT
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You don't have to have this grand story.
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All it needs really is heart.
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As long as it has that, your story is always going to matter, whether it's good or bad, or it's a combination of both.
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Welcome to Gamer Tag.
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On this episode, scartof46, brian Osiris and Martha Maple sit down with Mephisto214, a gamer, a dad and someone who's carried more than most.
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A content warning before we begin this episode includes open conversations about mental health, self-harm and suicide.
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If that feels overwhelming today, take care while listening or come back when you're ready.
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Timestamps for these sections are clearly marked in the show notes so you can navigate the episode in a way that feels right for you.
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What you're about to hear isn't a headline or a highlight reel.
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It's one person's truth Around.
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Here, every name holds a story and every story matters.
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This one's heavy, but it's also honest, human and, truthfully, one of the most beautiful stories we've ever had the honor to tell.
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If you're ready, let's roll the honor to tell.
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If you're ready, let's roll.
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Hey, mephisto214,.
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Thanks for joining us on this episode of Gamertag.
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What's up, dude Living the dream?
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Hey, dudes, let's start with like, where did the name Mephisto214 come from?
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What is that name to you?
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And like where did it start, dude?
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mephisto.
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214 is my latest gamer tag.
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That came from back when I was with my daughter's mom.
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She's also a gamer, she's brilliant to diablo and there'd be times that we'd just be sitting there having a drink and she would just go on about the lore of diablo like the whole story would just tell me and I would soak it all.
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Just listen to her talk about Diablo for hours and I remember her mentioning Mephisto and I had already liked the name Mephisto because I'm a comic nerd.
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So Mephisto in the comics I was like cool and I just, I don't know, I liked his character the most out of everyone in Diablo and so when I changed from my previous gamertag before Mephisto, I landed on that one.
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It was either that or Maltheo.
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I chose Mephisto.
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I just I don't know, I guess because I had more of a connection with the name because of comics.
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So it just made sense.
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And the 214 was because we were up in dallas at the time, so that's just the area code.
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Yeah, because I didn't want to do like mephisto and like a random set of numbers and she tried to talk me into mephisto 666 and I was like okay, I tried it and it was taken.
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I was like no surprise there.
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So I was like I'll just do 214 and got that look of so unoriginal.
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It's like what do you want from me?
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bro, how old were you when you got into like, uh, I'm gonna get on the internet and play video games and I need a name.
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Like how old were you when you started that whole journey?
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online gaming.
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Oh man, I was a junior or sophomore in high school and COD I would just play Call of Duty all the time.
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World at War was probably the one that got me hooked on online gaming the most and that was just what I played all the time.
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Started on Xbox, my first game that I ever played was Nintendo At that time because I grew up in the 80s I'm an 80s baby, you know pretty much had everything At some point in my life Atari, nintendo, super Nintendo, sega, cd, all that stuff so like console gaming has been in my blood since I was young.
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Yeah for sure, and yeah, that's where it started.
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But yeah, in high school, junior, sophomore or junior, that's when I got into online gaming.
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Did you have a bunch of friends that you were playing with at the time?
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Because I think it was pretty common back in the day where you would go to school and hang out with the same five people that were all playing the same game.
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Then you would just jam on that game constantly.
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No, I had two or three friends that we would get on and play, and it wasn't until later on the early 20aughts that, yeah, that's when the group grew bigger.
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But yeah, I had like mainly two friends that I would get on and play with and that's all we did as soon as we got out of school.
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If we didn't have to go work our our high school jobs, if we were free and there wasn't a football game that night, hey, we were gaming oh yeah, that was, that was my life too.
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I, we would hang out in the shop class and then someone would set up like a projector and then we would, we would play games off the projector in shop class.
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Halo combat evolved, we would just play all the time.
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So mephisto comes from your, so it comes from diablo and your love for love for comics.
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What comics I'm mainly a marvel guy.
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Like I, I'll read some, some DC.
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I'm not like super well versed on everything DC but yeah, I'm a Marvel guy through and through.
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That's all I consume, like when it comes to comics, and then the movies, the shows.
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That's my jam.
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And talking about Marvel, my favorite characters, it's three way tie between Captain America, black Panther and Ghost Rider Robbie Reyes.
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Oh man.
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Yeah, dude, so I'm similar.
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Number one is Cap For me.
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I do love Ghost Rider, but I like Thor, thor ends up being like a big dummy and he grows into someone who has a brain and I love that evolution Because it's like See yourself in that.
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Yeah, I see myself in that 100%, where I'm like, wow, I was a big dummy for a long time and then I grew up.
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But man, cap, he's the best.
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He is, yeah, like, I'm a huge Cap fan when people ask me oh, who would win if Cap fought this person?
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blah, blah, I'm a cap fan through and through yeah, portobello and I have this conversation constantly, where it's not that she's asking me like who would beat who, but every time she's like who's the best, I'm like bro, it's cap, there is not a question.
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She's like that you're an idiot, that's not like how this would work ever and I'm like, but he's got the biggest heart, that's all that matters yeah, the cap, like everything you said about that so like when did like the mephisto name right, just a two or four?
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like I'm sure there was a time like you've probably gone through that time in your life where you've had like a number of gamer tags and been known by a couple different names, but like when did this one start to really stick?
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All right, you mentioned that it was about you know the evolution and like the story with your daughter's mom, but like when did it start to stick?
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It stuck the minute that we got up in Dallas.
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We moved up there.
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A lot of things were falling apart down in Central Texas.
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I just lost my father and then, before our daughter was born, we were pregnant once before, had a miscarry, and so we were just like we need to get out of here there.
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There's too much bad like memories around here.
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So, you know, we went up there like her side of the family is up there, and so we were close to them and we were playing destiny 2 and I was like man, I really want to change my gamer tag.
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And she understood change the scenery, change everything.
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And it shed that old version of you, because that's what life's about growing and shedding.
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And sat down and we were like, okay, brainstorming.
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She was so helpful because she asked me she wasn't trying to just come up with names, she was asking me okay, what are you like?
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Just asked me all these questions.
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That got the wheels in my brain just turning and, like I said, it eventually landed on mephisto and that's like the minute that I was like, yeah, I'm gonna do that.
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The minute that I had a to accept the name change.
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That's when it stuck.
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So that was like 2019 when it stuck man, I think it's so cool how you describe like the need to reinvent yourself.
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One of the reasons why we started Gamertag was like I don't think people always connect that these, like names that we call ourselves for whatever reason, are like a representation of a time in our life or a representation of a moment that we connect to and like we embody that thing a little bit because, like you know, in life we all have names, but you don't get to change that name or change the experiences you've had, but you can rebuild new ones and I think that's so cool that you look at it.
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I mean that's how I've always looked at life, Like at it.
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I mean that that's how I've always looked at life like.
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I've had three gamer tags my entire life, and what were they?
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The very first one was vagabond 83.
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Of course I'm unoriginal.
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The 83 is the year that I was born and I like vagabond.
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That's strong, I like that yeah, and the reason I chose that is because, like you know, I'm such a lon, a loner Like I.
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You know I'd like to talk and I like to meet new people and stuff, but 10 times out of 10, I a lot of times I just want to be alone.
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I just let me do me.
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And then watching Ninja Scroll like almost every day for a while, and them referring to a Ronin as vagabonds, and I was like I like it, so I chose vagabond and then, you know know, went with 83 as my birth year.
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I had that for such a long time and then when I shed that it or I picked that just because of like my mental state, like I just wanted to be alone, didn't really want to interact with people, but yet here I was playing online games with people, you know so uh, you know, and when I changed from that one, it was more the next gamertag that I had was I don't want know how to describe it.
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Then you look for a way to like tie words to a thing that you identify with right and, like you know, you repaint yourself, like you just mentioned, and it's you trying to play with that part of yourself like how you were talking about it.
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It's something like to us gamers to a good majority, that have certain identities, certain gamer tags handles whatever you want to call it to a good bit of them, like it has meaning for them, best way to put it in the terms that people can understand it, like if somebody really loves the song and they say, oh, that describes you know my life right now type of thing For most of us that have, I guess if you want to say meaningful gamer tags like, that's best way that I could try to describe it to somebody when they ask why'd you choose this or anything like that is you know you have a favorite poem, a favorite artist, you know something that you relate to that just shows people who you are.
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That's how I try to approach gamer tags.
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I want people to know who I am.
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It's a vibe, yes, and it's a vibe that happens like that moment, that one day, and then you chase that vibe, just like you chase a song or you chase a poem, and you like manifest emotions or relationships with that, like persona Right.
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So it's like it's 100 hundred percent of vibe.
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I totally get that.
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Yeah, you mentioned vagabond.
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What other gamer tags have?
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you had the second one, the last one that we're talking about, because we already talked about mephisto and double backed all the way to vagabond.
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And the last gamer tag that I had before mehisto was Torch 512, because that was my area code.
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Torch came about because, like I said, a pivotal moment in my life.
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I'm somebody that's dealt with depression my entire life.
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Just people say I remember things differently, almost I don't want to say gaslighting but try to say no, this didn't happen that way.
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But you experience things in your life and you see them for what they were.
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Everybody's going to experience something different.
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They could see the same thing and they're going to experience it completely different.
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But for me a lot of stuff stuck and just it fed into my depression.
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And you know it got to a point in my life where gaming wasn't bringing me happiness.
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Trying to surround myself with friends wasn't doing anything.
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I would work out when I wasn't working.
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I would draw, I would stick my nose in books you know, comic books, novels, like I was trying to find something to make me happy and it wasn't until later that you know you can't look for other things to make you happy.
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You have to look for other things to help you manage throughout life and it, you know, it got to a point where I stopped caring and I tried to end my life and I just literally let go of the wheel and got into a car accident Thankfully no one was around.
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Got into a car accident Thankfully no one was around.
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I was on fire for five minutes.
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I got pulled out of the vehicle and I remember waking up in the hospital and the minute that I woke up I'm surrounded by my family and I could see the sadness in their eyes.
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You know they didn't know what happened, they just knew that I was in a bad accident and I felt guilt, remorse, what have you?
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And because I tried to just give up, not really thinking about how it was going to affect other people and people.
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And from that moment, before I knew it, the personality of torch was born.
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I immediately started cracking jokes.
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They were there and they're just crying and I was like, okay, I got a light in the moon and, like I said, torch was borncoming.
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This person who flips anything that's serious, that saddens people or makes them angry, does anything he can to get people to laugh and then eventually see the bright side hey, I'm still here and then my sister came in.
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She came in by herself and you know she's holding my hand.
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She's like is there anything that you need me to do for you?
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I'm here.
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I told her.
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I said hey.
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I said go to the corner store, go get some graham crackers, some chocolates, some marshmallows we're going to make some s'mores because it's still hot and she kind of laughs and again, I'm doing everything I can to put her mental health first.
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Like I said, I tried to give up and that moment opened my eyes.
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It showed me that we don't think about things all the way through.
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And then later on I started seeking help.
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You know people that felt the same way that I did.
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And years later I got better.
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I got better at handling the depression.
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I make it work for me.
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I don't I'm not a slave to it, that's not just.
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I don't still have depression, I know I have it, but I manage.
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And after that, going back to gaming, like something changed.
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I had more friends online Gaming dude, I'm a comic nerd.
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I pretty much invented myself as that Johnny storm character.
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He was always a joker, like always he was non-serious, like he just wasn't serious.
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And that's who I was.
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When I was Torch.
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I was not serious.
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You could ask any of my friends online playing whenever Torch was there.
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It was a fun time because I was just always joking and I would make fun of myself too.
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That's just who I was thank you for sharing your story.
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I think that's like really admirable that you tell this story and you're so open about it, because these are real things that you went through and this is, I think, your intention with telling that story is.
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You know, other people may see themselves in that story and I just want to say thank you for telling it.
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Of course.
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Do you feel like the torch, gamertag or persona that you took on like helped you heal because you changed the way that you thought about?
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problems.
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Yeah, of course, even though I wasn't always serious all the time and there were times that I was, but for the most part it taught me at that point in my life to laugh at everything.
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Don't let something affect you in a negative way.
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Turn it into a positive.
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Laugh it off.
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You want to cry about it for a few minutes?
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Go for it, but after that laugh it off.
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And that's where I was at.
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I didn't let things really get to me anymore.
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I'm not saying that I masked anything with jokes and laughter.
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No, that helped to get me down that path of healing myself physically and mentally, but then also down the path to continue to be able to deal with depression no everything that life throws at you yeah, I super get it.
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I think these names, like you said earlier, if you didn't grow up this way or you didn't have this experience in your life, like these names can just be some frivolous thing.
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Lots of people that have gamer tags that are definitely something they feel like is dumb or they would change or whatever.
00:17:24.809 --> 00:18:01.503
Yeah, but then I think, like you talked about throughout your story, from vagabond to torch and mephisto, there are different parts of your evolution as a person and that's what it's all about, because as people, we just experience things, but in the effort of chasing that vibe like we were talking about earlier, or trying to be a thing, we almost embody that character or that style that we're trying to, and so sometimes those names that we give ourselves are targets of who we want to be, and I think that's really admirable that you can recognize that and have that type of reflection.
00:18:03.593 --> 00:18:23.394
I think it's really cool with Vagabond, and particularly with Torch, how you're using these names to reclaim these really difficult moments or even just time periods in your life, like what you did with Torch and I.
00:18:23.394 --> 00:18:40.855
Just it's insane how you were able to reclaim that moment and turn it into something beautiful, something that drew people to you and something that made you, gave you what you needed to go on.
00:18:41.778 --> 00:18:42.019
Yeah.
00:18:42.571 --> 00:18:43.856
And I'm really glad that you did that.
00:18:46.432 --> 00:18:47.395
Are you crying right now?
00:18:47.958 --> 00:18:48.097
No.
00:18:49.910 --> 00:18:50.953
She's got dust in your eye.
00:18:50.953 --> 00:18:51.414
I get it.
00:18:51.414 --> 00:18:52.278
I get it, no.
00:18:52.298 --> 00:18:52.980
You're cats bro.
00:18:54.070 --> 00:18:55.976
Freaking cats, man, freaking cats in your eye.
00:18:55.976 --> 00:18:56.337
I get it, I get it.
00:18:56.337 --> 00:18:57.305
No, cats, bro, freaking cats, man, freaking cat.
00:18:57.305 --> 00:18:58.672
Every now and then torch comes back out.
00:18:58.672 --> 00:19:02.707
You know, even though I'm a fisto now, you know I'm a little more serious now.
00:19:02.707 --> 00:19:08.974
Talking to me for an hour or two you probably wouldn't be able to tell, but trust me, I was a lot more immature back then.
00:19:08.974 --> 00:19:11.465
But every now and then elements of torch come back out.
00:19:11.465 --> 00:19:12.851
It's usually the jokey parts.
00:19:13.211 --> 00:19:20.243
Like I said, you never really shed everything completely yeah, you're a combination of all of those different personas, exactly.
00:19:20.263 --> 00:19:34.372
Yeah, I totally get it you're not a streamer and you're not a creator, you're just a gamer, I think, like the other four of us in here, and that's exactly who we designed this show for is, you know, the gamer.
00:19:34.372 --> 00:19:38.309
So I'm just I'm curious what made you say yes to coming on to Gamertag?
00:19:38.309 --> 00:19:40.957
What about the process?
00:19:40.957 --> 00:19:43.301
Or like what we're trying to do here appealed to you.
00:19:44.871 --> 00:19:50.221
What appealed to me was the fact that, hey, I get to talk about myself and people are going to listen.
00:19:50.221 --> 00:19:50.702
No, I'm playing.
00:19:50.702 --> 00:19:54.132
No, Martha was the one that sold me on it.
00:19:54.132 --> 00:19:59.974
And a little bit of backstory for those who may not have heard previous episode Martha used to be Gangsta Boo 3000.
00:19:59.974 --> 00:20:02.996
That's when I met Martha.
00:20:02.996 --> 00:20:07.458
I call her the gamer formerly known as Gangsta Boo 3000.
00:20:07.458 --> 00:20:09.419
A little Prince reference there for you.
00:20:09.419 --> 00:20:12.641
Anyway yeah, I met her and we vibed.
00:20:12.641 --> 00:20:14.521
Right away Found out we were both gamers.
00:20:14.922 --> 00:20:16.782
We're like oh yeah, cool Call of Duty.
00:20:16.782 --> 00:20:23.567
And then eventually got her into Destiny and we started gaming online and, like I said, we played Call of Duty.
00:20:23.567 --> 00:20:25.827
For what was it like?
00:20:25.827 --> 00:20:28.980
Two years, three years, that's what we were playing.
00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:31.194
I'm not claiming three years, I might give you two, okay.
00:20:32.530 --> 00:20:33.675
Yeah, so we played that for a while.
00:20:33.675 --> 00:20:47.042
And okay, yeah, so we played that for a while and then eventually I transitioned to destiny when it first came out and I got martha on it and my buddy, deflo, that I play with from time to time.
00:20:47.042 --> 00:20:52.020
To this day he doesn't play destiny anymore, but every now and then we'll play like call of duty.
00:20:52.020 --> 00:21:03.347
You know, it's the only game that he'll play, that I'll actually play with him, but that was the fire team Torch 512, gangsta Boot 3000, and D-Flow 512.
00:21:03.347 --> 00:21:07.394
We were the fire team and that's all we did.
00:21:07.394 --> 00:21:20.411
We played Destiny all the time for hours on end and we were part of a raid race for Destiny 2 for Leviathan Day.
00:21:20.411 --> 00:21:26.763
One minute one we jumped in and it was what a 27-hour stream, martha.
00:21:27.490 --> 00:21:29.198
It was a long one, for sure.
00:21:29.931 --> 00:21:30.313
It was.
00:21:30.313 --> 00:21:38.050
But it is fun If you have the right group, if you're not trying to be like uber sweaty, if you're not trying to be number one, you're.
00:21:38.050 --> 00:21:39.093
I feel like you're fine.
00:21:39.093 --> 00:21:42.741
But if you're one of the sweats like you're trying to get that, I get it.
00:21:42.741 --> 00:21:44.737
You want to be the first, I get it.
00:21:44.737 --> 00:21:52.377
But if you don't have that mentality to be the first, if you just want to be part of that day one group, cool, you're going to have fun.
00:21:52.377 --> 00:21:58.645
And it took us 27 hours, roughly 27, maybe 28 was this 27 straight hours?
00:21:59.006 --> 00:22:04.479
or yes yes, oh my gosh, I took vacation, I took vacation for this.
00:22:05.059 --> 00:22:10.776
Oh man, the joy that I felt when we completed that.
00:22:10.776 --> 00:22:11.557
You know, we beat it.
00:22:11.557 --> 00:22:33.314
Of course, at that time I was meaning a titan, and so of course you had the fist of panic as your super for arc and that's what I ran with and I just remember running out of ammo and I just went up to him and I was just like constantly just hitting him, just like keep going, and he's dead and I'm still just hitting him like you never know he might come back to life and I'm just realizing, hey, we, we beat.
00:22:33.314 --> 00:22:35.536
Like I was filled with so much joy.
00:22:35.556 --> 00:22:47.626
I think in that vein of what you're saying is you and Gangsta Boo 3000, aka Martha Maple, were big homies and you felt like hearing her story on the show.
00:22:47.626 --> 00:22:56.516
You were like I just want to tell my story and see if people want to connect with that and like Ryan was saying, that's been the whole thought of building.
00:22:56.516 --> 00:23:09.675
Building gamertag is like we're real people having real stories about like our lives and we live our lives online and like that moment you're describing about being like super happy about a day one contest raid.
00:23:09.675 --> 00:23:12.502
People may not understand that, but they do understand.
00:23:12.502 --> 00:23:15.546
Hey, I got to go do some cool stuff with my friends.
00:23:15.546 --> 00:23:17.336
We did something really challenging.
00:23:17.336 --> 00:23:19.894
There's not a guide for it.
00:23:19.914 --> 00:23:21.092
That just came out.
00:23:21.092 --> 00:23:24.770
You can't get on YouTube and watch a tutorial about how to walk through it.
00:23:24.770 --> 00:23:26.396
You have to.
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